Marmar

2010-06-25T08:28:00.001-07:00

ive moved

see ya there.

2010-06-24T10:46:00.000-07:00

I miss my babygirls a lot .

I wonder how they're doing now .

And i can hardly shut my eyes and go to sleep .

I just miss my R O B I N .

I just miss him a lot .

And i doubt that he does , i suppose not .

He's probably out there having his fun time while im unhappily running down tears for him .

Ive been praying a lot nowadays , and i hope that it will come true soon .

Insyaallah , amin .

And finally i changed my blogskin and update my blog kn ?

♥

2010-06-22T07:10:00.000-07:00

PUKIMAK KAU LA SIAL

Gi mati lagi bagos !

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE GERAM SIALLLL !!!!!!

2010-06-15T10:39:00.000-07:00

I had a splendid time with my girlfriends,
Darlene , Dinah , Safiah , Rifqah , Rabiatul Adawiyah .
We went to Waterfront Park and hangout there .
And Safiah maen rollerblade burok .hahahaha .

Pictures will be uploaded soon .
And tomorrow is my checkup at SGH .
Butterflies are in my stomach already .
I wonder what the doctor is going to say about my blood test results .
Doakan Mar everyone .
Tapi kalau saper nk doakan mar mati cepat pon ok jugak kan ? *sarcastic smile*
Haha

Currently with my friends at the LAN shop .
we're occupying our time until soccer starts at around 2.30am ?
so yeahh , that's about it .

2010-06-14T03:20:00.000-07:00

Darlene , here's a post for you .

You've been thinking about how we're doing .

I dont know about the rest of them , but i've been thinking about you most nowadays .

Looking through our pictures together , i cried .

I realised that we've been through almost everything together during my secondary school times.

I know i'm not there for you most of the time ,since ive graduated .

but i just dont want to interrupt your studies , thats all .

You're doing really well right now .

You're scoring at your expectations , maybe higher .

Im really proud of you my dear .

I just dont want you to be like me and regretting every single thing in life .

You're on the right path , continue with the journey .

I know you can do better than anyone else , because i have faith in you .

And please dont get the thinking that we have forgotten you .

Don't worry , i'll come find you soon .

I miss the old moments , i miss us .

I'm sure you do too . haha .

Darlene Nasril , you have been a wonderful friend for almost three years .

I sayaaaaang you ok .

♥

2010-06-10T06:25:00.000-07:00

I dont know why must you do this to me .
Maybe it's just karma .
Maybe i really can't get who i love anymore .
You know how i feel towards you , and its been that way eversince i'm single .
Youre the only one that managed to make me move on and forget him .
Seriously you did , i cant deny that fact .
I guess ill let fate have its say .
I give up .
but with my whole heart,
i would like to say that im madly deeply falling in love with you .
And i miss the old moments .
I just dont get it that things change for a sudden .

and to chia . grow up please .
Like you mentioned , im sorry if i didnt get a clue of what youre trying to say ,
But still , dont disturb my life which i already love the way it is now .
Confronting face to face is a better way .
There's no need for you to send me random messages to me in facebook .
You're only good at words through internet .
Biler terserempak tk tau nk pandang .
Haishh , come on la .
Youre younger than me , so i just have to let you say what you want .
I have my own problems to settle .
So yahh , aku tkde time .
Just go on with your lovely yusof la babe .
Last long if you must .
(:

2010-06-03T07:49:00.000-07:00

To Riduan ,
I'm sorry if i have to end this .
Its not that i dont want to be friends with you ,
i just dont feel comfortable ,
Whatmore , i dont like hurting peoples hearts .
And to tell you the truth ,
Someone has stolen my heart .
I'm finally in love again like before .
It's better to say it now then later .
Im sorry .

2010-05-27T11:20:00.000-07:00

Feat. Corinne and Hidayah
We three have been sharing a lot nowadays .
Be it love or anything random
We've gone through almost the same kinds of situation most of the time .
And i really hope that we can spend more quality time together .
Thank you for everything
♥
and Corinne , i dont know when im uploading the photos ,
but ill make it as soon as possible ok ?
Love ya !

2010-05-26T01:41:00.000-07:00

OOOOHHHHHH , HAHA .
YOU'RE A GUY . ???? hahahahahahahahaha !!!
YOU GOT BALLS RIGHT ?
MEET ME THEN .
SEE YOU SOOOOOON ! (:
<3

2010-05-24T07:35:00.000-07:00

Currently at home.

Just got back home from 832.

had a miracle breakdown for a moment .

Dont know why .

But i guess its a normal thing ?

Well , im working soon , so wont be updating much.

Take people .

AND GET A LIFE LA EH "BLOGHOPPER" .

mak kau da kasi namer , kalau yer pon letak la namer kau yang cantik sangat tuhh .

aku da cukop saba ngan kau.

2010-05-21T09:37:00.000-07:00

thank god , ive talked things out with them all .
Thank you for giving me a second chance .
ill change , and those fun memorable times will be back soon .
I promise .
Love you all .
♥

2010-05-18T11:41:00.001-07:00

Thank god things have been well with me and my friends .
But some are just getting on my nerves .
Pfft .

2010-05-11T11:03:00.000-07:00

Saw you just now at man fut tong .
Somehow , i hate you , but i miss those moments we had at the same time ?
Good luck with your new relationship with her .
Takecare of her .
I know you can do better than last time .
Still love you no matter what
♥

2010-05-06T08:00:00.000-07:00

Currently at home .

Played soccer at Man Fut Tong just .

Talking about that , i miss the moments when i always spent my time there with Hazwan .

Well , i don't know why im having this perplexed emotions .

I always hated this kind of feeling .

Once , i had someone to be by my side and giving me the strength to be at the top again .

Now , i lost everything .

I can't depend on anyone , i can't trust anyone .

People said that i have tons of friends .

Yes , i do , but i don't take it that they'll be there for me .

I'm terrified myself , whether should i tell them my problems .

I can't trust anyone 's mouth now .

Well , at least i'm laughing again .

Being myself , the old mariam .

Where she's used to having no friends .

Where she used to stick to only one person .

Where she used to live independantly .

But yeahh , that's not including hazwan of course . hahahaha .

Having not many friends is also equal to less fights and miscommunications .

Going out in a minute .

Playing LEFT4DEAD !

2010-05-04T17:54:00.000-07:00

Picture taken with Rifqah's friends . ((:

It's been a really long time since i updated my blog .
Well, a lot of things happened in a week .

Now i believe in karma .

What goes around does comes around .

Ive been a bad girl .

All i can say is sorry .

That's the only thing i can do .

To be forgiven is up to you all .

I don't really care no more .

If you guys really hate me , then say it

even before this case happened .

No need to be hypocrites and stepping gerek .

Friends come and go , they don't stick like glue .

2010-04-22T09:51:00.000-07:00

"Memories are something that keeps you warm , but it's also something that tears you apart"

♥

Hello people , alhamdulillah , i'm discharged from the hospital .

So yeahh , it's only 3days and 2 nights spent there .

My body is getting more and more weaker .

And my body is getting more fatter , after all the liquids being pumped inside .

Not to mention , i'm getting way chubbier ! hahahahahahaha .

Anyways , just now at the hospital , i had to do a minor operation at my neck .

Minors as in there's no stretch of doctors and complicated procedures .

It's for a short time as well .

The doctor told me to tilt my head to the side as she had to poke through a needle in my neck .

Trust me , there was no medication to numb my neck .

I felt all the pain .

The needle was poked through , and she scraped the "stuff" that was infecting my neck .

In a twisting manner ,

Imagine you unscrewing a nail from a wood , that's how it's being done .

And she repeated it 5 times .

Wow , from there , i was certain that there will be no more hospitals for me .

♥

When i got home , ***** texted me to see how was i doing .

My hand hurt a lot , and it was hard for me to text people ,

so i called him up and we talked .

He was sick as well .

Prolly not going to school huh boy ? Haiyooo .

Haha , do takecare of yourself dearest .

You never failed to make me smile .

Love you a lot my friend . (:

2010-04-21T05:09:00.000-07:00

Thank you

Ajat , Ahboy , Safiah , Ali , Shawal

for visiting me today .

♥

2010-04-21T02:07:00.000-07:00

Babe , didn't know that we could be warded in the hospital on the same day .

It's the first time for me , but i know it's not for you .

You must take care of your health thoroughly babe ,

because it's not a good sign to be going in and out of the hospital several times .

I hope you're doing fine .

Lucky enough , my big brother brought my laptop along .

At least i could update something .

Just went for my scanning ,

and the results are still pending .

I'm feeling the jitters right now .

Because the results of my scanning , xray and blood test all decides whether i should go for my operation .

I don't want to go for it , really i dont .

Since it's my first experience , blood tests are painful in a way .

But long the way , i'm getting used to it .

Doctor said my neck is either having infections , or something uninvited is growing .

Well , they are still investigating .

So i'll have to wait .

I don't know for how long must i stay here .

And Darvesh is coming out today .

I'm effing sad , i can't meet him today .

Haishhh , nevermind .

Guys , pray for the best of me ok ?

I'm not asking much .

I just want to go back home .

2010-04-19T20:24:00.000-07:00

Otw to hospital .

Pray that nothing will happen to me okay guys .

I'm effing scared .

2010-04-17T08:19:00.000-07:00

This post is for Kin .

Babe , i just read the message that you sent me through facebook .

I'm not a bad type of person ,

and i don't want to be labelled as one .

You can ask my close friends , they know me well .

I'm sorry if i ever hurt your feelings .

Like you said , we're girls .

I totally understand how you feel .

I've gone through the same situation as yours before .

Yes , it's true that i fell for you boyfriend before .

But that's until i found out that he belongs to someone else .

There's nothing in between me and him at all .

I don't want to fight .

Because i respect you , and whatmore you're older than me .

You've seen the world more than me .

To tell you the truth , i have no guts to even talk to you .

It's the first time that i'm being this way .

Because i know that im in the wrong .

That's the reason why i walked away when i saw you at Vista Point .

Maybe it's because i know that i'm the cause of this problem .

I've made the worst mistake , and i hope that you can forgive me .

I really don't want to be enemies with you ,

since i dont even know you , yet .

You're a nice person

You talked things out calmly , and i don't even know how did you manage to do that .

If i were you , i would just beat up the girl .

Kin ,you dont have to worry. i wont disturb him anymore.

I won't disturb you and him .

I've got my own life , and i want to live it in a meaningful way .

I really don't want to dwell over this things .

i'm sorry for everything .

I'll meet up with you soon , and apologise .

2010-04-17T07:37:00.000-07:00

i just want run away to this place and leave everything behind .

it looks so peaceful doesn't it ?

well , its now almost 11pm .

didn't went out the whole day .

had no mood at all , i dont know why .

But know , i got the mood to play left for dead !

haha , gonna get ready soon .

Wan just texted me , sorry if i didn't turn up for your show at Bedok .

it's so far , and to tell you truth , i don't even know how to get there . HAHA .

Meeting Rifqah and Safiah tomorrow .

It's been a long time since we met up . Miss them a lot .

Mummy and Daddy not at home .

They didn't even inform me that they went out to Johor .

Pfft , i want to follow sehh !

They just left me 10 bucks and a box of cigarettes . Baek ahh , left a few sticks only .

-.-

I'm effing bored .

nothing to post also .

bye ahh . haha .

2010-04-16T01:39:00.000-07:00

After school , went to 832 .

And i'm happy to see the people up there .

It's been a long time since i last saw them .

We took tons of picture .

Check them out at Facebook aite ?

And school was fine .

The best thing is that , you're free to do anything you want .

But must be independent of course .

Nevertheless , the subjects i'm learning are all general stuff .

You discuss , make a presentation out of it , and present it to the whole class .

Everyday 's routine .

It's all public speaking work .

And i ♥ it .

There's plans tonight .

Can't wait .

2010-04-15T19:03:00.000-07:00

woohoooo !

school is fun ! haha.

anf life is fine .

i'm enjoying it to the fullest .

♥

2010-04-14T21:47:00.000-07:00

I miss Vesh Chocolate . haha .

2010-04-14T18:52:00.000-07:00

Hey everyone , currently in Republic Polytechnic for my first lesson .

All my classmates are fine , and there's two of them from Riverside .

And i realise that there are soooo many breaks on between .

School finishes at 3.30pm , almost everyday .

Cool or what .

2010-04-11T05:17:00.000-07:00

picture featuring Aten

♥

Sorie for not updating much .

Been busy with personal problems .

I'm in a mess now .

But i know that i'll be strong for the people that i love .

Thank you for those who have helped in one way or another .

May it be little or wholesome .

Im blessed to have such wonderful companions by my side .

Thank you once again .

♥

Tears

2010-04-09T15:03:00.000-07:00

Thank you for lending your shoulders to cry on .

Thank you for lending me your ears , just to listen to my problems .

I know that you'll always be there

♥

Today was just a random day .

Apologies to Aten for not being able to make it for SHISHA .

Haha , had something else going on , you should know why right ?

Woke up around 5 plus in the afternoon .

Then mom gave me money and i bought some clothes at cotton on .

After that met Dinah , Haikal , Zuhairah ,

Slacked till 12am ?

Then walked my way to Vista there , meet up with the clan .

Went to Tekong afterwards to join Aten and her friends .

Drank .

I miss your presence a lot .

2010-04-08T04:49:00.000-07:00

I'm missing this chick of mine a lot .

Babe , where have you been ?

It's been a long time since we met .

And i hope that we can meet up one day ,

to catch up with things .

I know you're busy with school .

I'm schooling soon as well . please call me up as soon as possible .

I miss you , and i love you , a lot .

♥

Currently 7.57pm

slacking with my Vista friends as usual .

And i'm effing hungry !

haha , maybe buying some food later .

Longing to eat Chicken Cutlet rice . YUM !

Ooohh , yesterday was a great day .

Drank our way through the night . Got tipsy , still can control myself .

Haha .

And i saw Achmad as well . Thank god he still talks to me .

Miss him a lot yannow . ((:

And and , i have nothing else at the back of my head .

Will update when i have something interesting to post about .

Goodbye people .

2010-04-07T01:05:00.000-07:00

hello bloggers .

It's currently 4.06pm .

And currently spending my time at home with Nuur Ezma Illia .

And today is MUMMY'S 48th BIRTHDAY !

I LOVE YOU SO MUCH MUMMY! Besok adek , abang , ayah belanje makan tao .

♥

To start off , Ezma called up my house at around 2plus ?

Saying that she's on the way to my crib .

Every single time we met , there's always gonna be tons of photos taken .

Haha , standard eh Ezma ?

Well , the rest of the photos are at my Facebook and Ezma's blog .

Go check it out kalau tkde keje ,haha .

Prolly going out later in the night , slack and ton like usual .

And i'm missing him a lot ! Bleaghhh .

2010-04-04T00:37:00.000-07:00

hello bloggers , it's been quite some time since i updated my blog .
Sad to say , Vesh Chocolate must go back to camp later in the night ,
for one month .
He's been there for me throughout .
And i don't know who to turn to when he's gone .
We've made a promise , and i can assure you that i will keep that promise .
Thank you for being a great friend ,
take care of yourself . ((:

Currently 3.43pm .
Not feeling soo well , ate too much i guess .
Haha .
Went to Grandlink again yesterday .
But before that , spent the morning till the afternoon at Dinah'smum wedding .
it was the best ,
but after we got drunk , it was somewhat infuriating and saddening at the same time .
Got extremely emotional in a sense .
What to do , i had to let out everything that was kept inside of me
The burden , the demoralizing pain .
Thank you everyone for being there ,
especially Darlene , Safiah , Aten .
I Love you girls .
And now, i can finally see myself curving a smile .
Laughing like never before .
I'm appreciating my life now .
ECSTATIC !

2010-03-31T02:11:00.000-07:00

STOP THE MISUNDERSTANDINGS OK?

LEAVE ME ALONE .

AND DINAH , KOL ME WHEN YOU READ THIS .

Specially for my babygirls .

2010-03-23T12:22:00.000-07:00

DINAH AMIRA , my best bitch .

Hey , i cried when i thought of you today .

I'm not changed , u assumed i changed because i dont go 832 already right ?

babe , im still me .

It's just that i hate the guys at 832 already .

You should know why , because you always know my problems first hand .

If you love me , you will understand why .

First , it's Raja , then Ajat , then Fazz , then the Yusof thing .

See what i've been through my dear ?

I'll still be meeting you and your brother .

Because i love both of you more than anything else in this world .

Even though i get pissed off at you for reasons that you cant keep secrets ,

i accepted that fact , because human beings make mistakes .

I'll meet you soon , dont worry .

RIFQAH , my hot mama .

Babe , i miss you a lot , like fucking a lot .

It's been weeks that i havent met you , whatmore here anything from you .

I'm like you now , i'm not part of 832 anymore .

Because i realised that i get more stressed when i slack there .

Mit up soooooon . Please .

Safiah , the best girlfriend .

And you babe , i realised that you're running away from me .

Why?You should know it yourself .

I cried just to think of it .

I'm not in my normal state .

I'm going to change my life .

I'll stop working with them .

i'll stop meeting them as well .

But i'm not going to be MIA-ing from you and the rest of you girls.

I miss you the most .

Im sorry for everything , for hurting you and not being the crazy marmar that you know .

I'll change , in time .

Darlene , my best of the best junior .

Babe , i need your shoulder .

I need the listening ear of yours .

I know you'll be busy with school and everything .

But text me whenever you're free .

You have been there for me most of the time .

But i dont see it now .

I wont be slacking at 832 anymore .

And i wont be working with them either .

I've found another job .

Again , i miss you .

HELL , i miss all my BABYGIRLS .

2010-03-21T19:30:00.000-07:00

Everything just seems impossible .

Why must i always face the music alone ?

Why must love exist ?

And since it does , why must heartbreaks appear there after ?

2010-03-20T17:44:00.000-07:00

2009 picture .

see how chubby i was last time ? ):

Hey readers .

Currently 730am

And just got back from Grandlink , or Grandcity?

haha , forgot the place .

Anyway , enjoyed myself a lot .

Managed to release my stress with them around .

(: thankyouthankyou .

Met Hashim and Izwan at 521 first thing first .

And i realised that guys nowadays consume more time to get ready than girls . (:

2010-03-19T03:31:00.000-07:00

*picture taken yesterday*

Problems arising at home just suffocates me .

Danial have been telling me to not run away and just face the problem .

But the more i face it , the more it hits me .

And for those who knows the typical mariam , i'll do stupid stuffs .

Because i am one .

Aisyah , do you realise something ?

My problems in life just keeps coming since i got into Riverside .

First the truancy thing , then the "no more freedom"

Then comes Hazwan , then comes the running away from home .

Then comes my parents beating me up till a drop of blood can be observed .

Then our friendship got out of hand .

And then i got no more companions since exboyfriend wont let me .

but thankfully my parents are the best now .

but its typical if they were to suck at times right ? HAISHHHH .

Crap , what a life .

But i realised that i have found my true friends .

They are the ones who always listen to my problems .

Hazwan , maybe all of this won't happen to me ,

IF I DIDNT MEET YOU AT ALL .

you ran away again after what you did to me .

Where's your responsibilities ?

MOTHERFUCKER . GO AND DIE .

FINALLY YOU'RE OUT OF MY HEAD

after 3 years 2 months of our journey , and 8 months to forget you .

HOW LONG IS THAT HUH ? TOOT .

2010-03-10T09:51:00.000-08:00

AISYAH BANGS IS MISSED TOOOOOO .
And it surprised me that you texted me while i was working .
Thank god u still remember me . (:
Haha .
Hey , even though it's been a long time since we met each other ,
i really want us to spend time like before .
WE MISS YOU OKAY , all of us .
The thing that i miss the most about Siti Aisyah is her non stop laugh !
Text me soon .
We'll catch up with things .
I've got loads to tell you . Things that i havent told anyone yet .
MWAHHHHHHH2!
♥ Marmar

2010-03-06T23:47:00.000-08:00

Life has been literally insane .
I have this mixed feelings ,
of wanting to fight for my love , or just run away and being an irresponsible human being
Ive faced a lot of challenges
and i can't recall myself whether i faced it through or not .
I still love my ex boyfriend .
And if ANYONE were to read the previous statement , DONT ask who is the guy .
Some people know what i mean .
Anyway , i miss those moments , i cried every day just to think of it .
I dont know why im punished constantly , and it's not coming to an end .
I know i've not been a good individual .
But at least give me some peace .
Whenever happiness came , there's always something to stop it ,
or whatmore , take it far far away from me .

2010-03-04T10:56:00.000-08:00

My post for today .
Sorry for not updating much .
Babygirls , where are you ?
I'm waiting for your messages and calls .
And Rifqah , i dont know how to get through you .
I MISS YOU ALL A LOT .
I've been only seeing Dinah for this few days .
But not the rest of you .
I know i've been busy working .
I'm hurt , and i need my listening ears and those shoulders to cry on .

2010-03-02T09:26:00.001-08:00

YOU HURT ME , AGAIN .
thanks for everything

HAISHHHHH

2010-02-23T12:35:00.000-08:00

The lyrics of this song is specially dedicated to you
YOU WERE MY EVERYTHING - By Aviation
This goes out to someone that was
Once the most important person in my life
I didn't realize it at the time
I can't forgive myself for the way I treated you so
I don't really expect you to either
It's just... I don't even know
Just listen…
You're the one that I want, the one that I need
The one that I gotta have just to succeed
When I first saw you, I knew it was real
I'm sorry about the pain I made you feel
That wasn't me; let me show you the way
I looked for the sun, but it's raining today
I remember when I first looked into your eyes
It was like God was there, heaven in the skies
I wore a disguise 'cause I didn't want to get hurt
But I didn't know I made everything worse
You told me we were crazy in love
But you didn't care when push came to shove
If you loved me as much as you said you did
Then you wouldn't have hurt me like I ain't shit
Now you pushed me away like you never even knew me
I loved you with my heart, really and truly
I guess you forgot about the times that we shared
When I would run my fingers through your hair
Late nights, just holding you in my arms
I don't know how I could do you so wrong
I really wanna show you I really need to hold you
I really wanna know you like no one else could know you
You're number one, always in my heart
And now I can't believe that our love is torn apart

I need you and
I miss you and
I want you and
I love you ‘cause
I wanna hold you,
I wanna kiss you
You were my everything
And I really miss you [2x]
I knew you gonna sit and play this with your new man
And then sit and laugh as you're holding his hand
The thought of that just shatters my heart
It breaks in my soul and it tears me apart
At times we was off I was scared to show you
Now I wanna hold you until I can't hold you
Without you, everything seems strange
Your name is forever planted in my brain
Damn it, I'm insane,
Take away the pain
Take away the hurt
Baby, we can make it work
What about when you
Looked into my eyes
Told me you loved me
As you would hugged me
I guess everything you said was a lie
I think about it, it brings tears to my eyes
Now I'm not even a thought in your mind
I can see clearly, my love is not blind

I need you and
I miss you and
I want you and
I love you ‘cause
I wanna hold you,
I wanna kiss you
You were my everything
And I really miss you [2x]
[Talking:]
I just wish everything could have turned out differently
I had a special feeling about you
I thought maybe you did too
You would understand, but…
No matter what, you'll always be in my heart
You'll always be my baby
Our first day, it seemed so magical
I remember all the time that I had with you
Remember when you first came to my house?
You looked like an angel wearing that blouse
We hit it off, I knew it was real
But now I can't take all the pain that I feel
Reach in your heart, I know I'm still there
I don't wanna hear that you no longer care
Remember the times? Remember when we kissed?
I didn't think you would ever do me like this
I didn't think you'd wanna see me depressed
I thought you'd be there for me, this I confess
You said you were my best friend, was that a lie?
Now I'm nothing to you, you're with another guy
I tried, I tried, I tried, and I'm trying
Now on the inside it feels like I'm dying
[Chorus:]
I need you and
I miss you and
I want you and
I love you ‘cause
I wanna hold you,
I wanna kiss you
You were my everything
And I really miss you

And I do miss you
I just thought we were meant to be
I guess now, we'll never know
The only thing I want is for you to be happy
Whether it be with me, or without me
I just want you to be happy

According to you

2010-02-18T10:52:00.000-08:00

hello people .
it's currently 2:53 am
And i'm at the North Plaza LAN game place with my friends .
We have been wasting our money for this one game ,
LEFT4 DEAD
It's amazingly addicted for a girl
Well,forget about that .

And i've been working a lot nowadays .
And im starting to loose more and more weight .
Well , good news i suppose .
I would also want to apologise to Rifqah and Safiah for not replying your text messages
My credit is low , and i dont even know when is my next topup
But I MISS YOU BOTH MORE .
Don worry , I'm free on Friday , i'll beep you both while i can .
Can't wait to see you all of my babygirls .

AND IM MISSING PRETTYBOY A LOT ,
Hope you're reading this text .
I REGRET WHAT I DID TO YOU .

2010-02-14T13:38:00.000-08:00

It's currently 5.39am and i'm currently playing the com with the two girls . *looks up*

and yeahh , feeling dam tired .

It's been two days that i havent slept .

And planning not to work tomorrow .

Feeling sick .

I love Dinah and Safiah

I miss Rifqah .

AND I APPRECIATE WHAT YOU GAVE ME
RAJA MUHD AZIZAN HAZIQ

you almost made me cry .

Its the best Valentine gift ever .

♥

14 February 2010

2010-02-13T18:03:00.000-08:00

HAPPY VALENTINES DAY BLOGGERS .

Firstly , i would like to say thank you Achmad Derajat for the wonderful Valentine gift .

It means a lot to me , and i'm awfully touched .

What more that you made it yourself .

Even though we're no longer the way you want us to be ,

i still treat you as my bestest bud .

And since i have a chance to say about you , i would also like to apologize

for any wrongdoings that i have caused you .

Once again , Thank You .

♥

And ouh , i'm working today .

I know , SUCK A LOT .

But there's no valentine for me , why in the world must i waste my time ?

Right ? *winks*

2010-02-10T20:35:00.001-08:00

Got this from CHIA'S blog .
Quite funny , haha .
But it scares me myself if it's actually true .

Baby don't let go .

2010-02-10T19:49:00.000-08:00

Its currently 11.51am , Thursday .

Speaking of Thursday , i just remembered that i'm working from tomorrow till Sunday .

I hope the schedule for next week wont be that hectic .

And i want to apologise to Safiah for not meeting you yesterday .

I assumed that if i met you , it will be for a short while , since it's 10plus already ,

whatmore you're schooling .

I'm so sorry .

Secondly , thank you Corinne and Zulhelmi for the birthday present .

I appreciate it loads .

And Corinne , even though i found out that you hate me ,

I still treat you as my girlfriend .

You know , friends come and go , but that's not the same for true friends .

So i should already know , that you're just a friend .

I don't want to be enemies , but you made everything turned out to be like this .

And , (sigh)(sigh)(sigh)

I miss you badly , i don't know why .

GOD , please help me .

tears have been rolling down my face like almost every single day.

It turns out to be an automatic routine .

I MISS YOU I MISS YOU I MISS YOU .

I thought that i hate you mother fucking much , but i can't lie to myself .

I know , i'm a piece of thrash to you .

Though hopes are frail to get what i really want ,

There's no way that we can kill that hope .

Ive started to pray .

After each prayer , i prayed about MOM and YOU ,

and it's without fail .

Every breath i take , i thought of you.

Every step that i take , i thought of you .

Every move that i make , i thought of you .

I wonder how can you ever forget this so easily and move on .

What about the memories ?

If you're reading my blog ,

then please , no one knows me better than you ,

and no one knows you better than me .

Push your ego and agree with .

I still love you , and i still want to be with you .

It's impossible , i know , but who cares ?

I believe in GOD's fate .

I MISS YOU , AND I ♥ YOU ,

PRETTYBOY ):

Just to you .

2010-02-09T10:04:00.000-08:00

And this post is specially for Darlene ♥

Even though we had fights and major misunderstandings ,

i know that we won't fall

Like i told you , sisters fight

I know that i can count on you to cool down and think through about this whole thing

We love you Darlene , all of us .

Don have the misconceptions that we're avoiding you .

Just because you rarely slack with us , doesn't mean that you're no longer part of us .

I'm not mad at you , because i understand you .

I've been through this before .

But everything happens for a reason .

And after all of this has ended , i'm positive enough that our bond will be stronger .

Just text me when you need someone to talk to .

Even though im busy working , i'll try my best .

I miss you a lot .

Dont think too much .

Love you a lot Darlene .

2010-02-06T12:11:00.000-08:00

Happy Birthday Babies .

2010-02-06T08:51:00.000-08:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY DEAREST RIFQAH

HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY TO MY DEAREST SAFIAH

Gosh , i love both of you guys .

And i hope that you both will live a fruitful life ahead of you .

Please study hard and dont let any obstacles in life pull you down

And i'm sorry if i've been spending less time with you both .

MAR MAR love you both , a lot .

True friends

2010-02-02T09:18:00.000-08:00

Darlene , Dinah , Rifqah , Safiah .

I miss you guys sooooo much .

I know that i'll be busy working .

But i promise you all that i'll set the time for us later .

I cried yesterday night .

I just miss all of you .

24 JANUARY 2009

2010-01-27T05:52:00.001-08:00

HAPPY 17TH BIRTHDAY RAJA MD AZIZAN HAZIQ !

I know that i wished you late .
But a least i was there on the dot of your birthday .
HAHA , it was fun .
But all of us made a nuisance , since it's 12am on the 24 of January .
Police came afterwards .
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA .
And Raja , i know we had soooooo many complications in between us .
You've been confessing your feelings towards me more frequently .
Yes , feelings do grow , but to tell you the truth .
I'm happier this way , SINGLE .
You know the reason as well .
Who caused this to me .
You hate the guy , and you told me to avoid him .
And i did .
I hope that your life wont be as miserable as last year .
Im sorry for eveything .
And , THANK YOU FOR EVERYTHING .
You've been there for me , all the time .

Tan Tock Seng Hospital .

2010-01-19T02:57:00.000-08:00

2nd post for the day.
Pictures featuring Mayat and KechyqSanchi .
Well , went to Tan Tock Seng Hospital with Kechyq,Darlene,and Mayat's mum .
The day was great , since Darlene was there to liven up the whole mood .
And when i saw mayat's neck , well i can't really describe how i thought of it .
The good thing about mayat was , he didn't look sick , at all.
He can still smoke and do silly stuffs in the hospital .
Haha , well , good thing that he's out of the hospital already .
Then trained our way back to woodlands .
Decided to window shop at cosway point for a while .
Then ended up me , Kechyq and Mayat buyin nose studs for ourselves .
After that , went to pasar malam to buy some food .
And then mayat and his mum headed home .
Then me , darlene , kechyq went to 832 .
Met up with Haikal , then headed to takraw court .
Went off after that and slack with 832 people till the night .

Small celebration

2010-01-19T02:41:00.000-08:00

As you can see , i celebrated my birthday on 16 january with 832 friends .
Not all are in those pictures .
But everything would be complete if Darlene,Deedee,Aisyah was there .
But nehmind , they're busy .
And i would like to take this opportunity to say.
Thank you ,
Dinah,Rifqah,Safiah,Durrah,ee cheekies,Fatin
Ajat,Achmad,Danial,Neo,Zuffrie,Raja,Azmi,Faris,
Jeremiah,Fyro.
Sorry if i left out some people .
And THANK YOU ,
Rifqah,Ajat,nas,Durrah,Zuffrie,Fatin.
For those wonderful presents you all brought.
This year's birthday is really meaningful.
THANK YOU ONCE AGAIN .

Sweet Seventeen

2010-01-15T23:23:00.000-08:00

GOODBYE SWEET SIXTEEN , HELLO SWEET SEVENTEEN !
THANK YOU to all the people who have wished me ,
and special thanks to ACHMAD DERAJAT , RAJA , NAS ,
for giving me presents unexpectedly .
yay , finally it's my birthday .
And i guess i have a birthday wish on mind .
I really hope that it will happen sooner , maybe later .
Though it's my birthday , i still couldn't catch up with life .
I'm stressed,what more perplexed about everything .
I really don't know who to choose .
I don't want to hurt anyone .
But my heart is still with him .
Dearest love,i dont know if you even know that i'm writing about you.
You know , when i first saw you at 832 , you captured my heart .
Like what other mention , love at first sight .
I got feelings for you , but i doubt that you do .
Then my babe friend told me something the following day.
What i heard was like a dream come true .
You had fallen for me too .
Then as days grew by , we started to contact each other and got closer .
Remember the first time we sat together near you house?
I didn't feel awkward or uneasy with you , at all .
Even if it's the two of us .
We talked and bullied each other , as though we have known each other for a long time .
Then came the day where a stupid tragedy happened to myself .
I can't write it here .
But you stood up for me and settled everything .
I really need you , but i doubt that you still need me.
we fought , yes .
But it's not my fault if i dont trust boys anymore .
I didnt even say to you that i trust her 100% .
And there you go spitting hurtful words at me .
That's the reason why i don't like to talk through the phone .
NOTHING can get settled , but worst will arise .
And now , we rarely contact , not rarely i must say , like almost NEVER ?
Haishh , i don't know why life is unforgiving .
I pray every night for you .
Where no one could here .
Only GOD knows how i feel .
Please come back .
I'm sorry , i apologise .

Marmar is proud of herself

2010-01-13T08:26:00.000-08:00

THANK YOU GOD BERY MUCH .

I'm soooo satisfied with my o level results .

Even though i know myself that i didn't put in 100% effort ,

i scored way above my expectations .

I achieved 13 points for L1R4.

And i made my family , especially my mum , PROUD .

Now , i can shut people's mouth who had been insulting and looking down on me ,

thinking that i wouldn't be able to make it through .

But i wished that i could score better .

To tell you the truth , i didn't study , at all .

HAHA .

Well , i'm elated that i'm eligible for many courses .

I can for JC , but i'm choosing SINGAPORE POLY . (:

TO start off ,

my laptop is fucking no more ,

because it's 100% spoilt .

bleagh . Now playing the comp at north plaza .

2 bucks for an hour , so worth it ya think ? (:

the rest of my friends are busy playing other games .

Achmad , Ajat , Mabok , Yus .

And it's fucking hard to find a job .

I've been going for countless interviews .

But none called .

I really don't want to waste my time .

But i guess its a bit too late ?

ANDAND ,

i've been thinking a lot lately about the complications im facing in life .

It's not that i don't want to move on .

It's just that i'm still stuck

Maybe it's better for me to be single and not hurt anyone's feelings but myself .

I'm really sorry ,

but love simply can't be forced .

Im not robot , i'm a human with feelings .

Hello

2010-01-09T14:50:00.000-08:00

HELLO PEOPLE .
I'm starting anew .
Please RELINK .

And ouh , HAPPY 2010 .
My laptop is currently undergoing repair .
So won't update every single day .

Life is currently having its ups and downs .
I know i'm strong , but unsure for how long more .
Love is undefinable , that's what i know .
But sometimes , it can hurt a lot .
A LOT I TELL YOU .
But i have my friends who i can count on .
Will update sooon .
Everything seems to be quite in a mess .
PS , I MISS AISYAH BONCHET .
Hope you're doing fine .
We'll meet tomorrow in school .
I HOPE I'LL AT LEAST PASS MY O LEVELS .
I hardly put in any effort .
Screw You , Mar . HAH .